Am I not acting how a real victim should?
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- Опубликовано: 12 апр 2025
- When you're the one who always takes care of others, who's there to take care of you?
Thanks to @celadonva for voicing both Eira and Anya.
Song is: The Windows Are Plastic from the Mouthwashing OST
Clinical Trial Spoiler I was inspired by one scene from that game for this video. Highly recommend playing the game out for yourself.
P.S. My OC and this video is non-canon to the game.
My Twitter: x.com/Joetastic_
My Discord: @ joetastic
Glad you liked Clinical Trial. I'm happy that a scene from something I made inspired you to make something too.
the people in the fandom really forgot that one of anya's philosophies is that our worst moments don't define who we are, and yet that's exactly what they're doing to her 💀
Now I understand what her line means. It hit hard the first time, but now it makes it even more deeper.
Dang...
how ppl in this fandom expect Anya to be: the helpless passive victim when she's so much more than that
Fandoms try not to define survivor characters only by their trauma challenge (impossible)
Fandoms try not to be the actual worst interactables on the internet
(wdym it’s a good thing?)
Real, also they dismiss REAL survivors whenever they try to speak on this, or abt anya in general
@Cakespresso which also allow bad faith actors to take the stand. Worse of all, abusers get away scot-free without consequences.
@@jimmyzarehow exactly? the way I see it, they're pointing out harmful discourses that spread online by the fans through this single post, you expect Anya to be defined by her trauma and is incapable of being her own person
Bro didn't even kiss the brick before he threw it at us
I’m using this, that’s golden.
The feeling of comfort from someone close to you feels better than being alone.
most valid comment of 2025 fr.
"Am I moving on too quickly- how bad does it need to hurt..?" This line broke me.
I actually really apprecitate this topic, people are acting like survivors are only defined by their trauma and should never be near anything remotely sexual, treating them like babies unable to live a normal life with normal feelings and urges. I hate how trying too hard to be an unproblematic, super moral and upstanding person can often make the very people you deem to "help" feel trapped in the expectations of how they're supposed to deal with their trauma.
Because if they do it "the wrong way", people will turn on them simply for not fitting the mold of what a victim should be.
Yeah... it's bad how people can't see to think everyone deals with trauma differently. Some SA victims, sure they stay away from sexual stuff, but some actually get hypersexuality. And some still feel comfortable with intimacy.
And for depression, people always assume someone looking sad is depressed. Not all depressed people are like that.
This goes with literally most and any mental illness or disorder. Society has one set look of how it's "supposed" to look and if anyone acts differently from their assumptions, they're lying. I hate the world sometimes.
@@Jellzy_Daniella_Animations well, don't we all? The labels we're giving, including stereotypes...it never ends.
this is absolutely so true. a huge part of the anxiety that comes with sa in the first place is wther or not your identity gets wiped, and it's a very valid struggle on its own, let alone with people actually enunciating this fear.
Yeah that's exactly what I'm saying!!
People are more than their trauma and infantilizing them like that will make them feel like their not a normal person anymore :(
I also see this within people saying that a character who went through SA shouldn't be sexualized or have NSFW art of them. I used to believe it until I saw a comment from an actual SA survivor saying that statement is actually does more harm to victims than good.
NO HELLO? NO HI? YOUR JUST GONNA THROW THAT AT ME??
I know, when i first saw this i was like " how the fuck do we move on from a meme to this "
For real… I watched this late at night in my bedroom and I was like “ how did it go from memes to… this. “ 💔💔💔
As an SA victim, this NEEDS to be seen. Especially in this fandom.
Mouthwashing has played a major role in my healing journey. I even started my own AU to help me better come to terms with my feelings and whether or not it was ok for me to feel how I did.
And I owe a lot of that healing to you. Your videos got me into the Mouthwashing fandom. If not for you, I never would have rekindled my love for art or writing. It pains me to see you being unjustly crucified for enjoying this phenomenal game/story in a completely healthy manner. I hate that the fandom that told me "I was okay" is slowly turning into one that represents the main antagonist so closely.
All this to say Thank you and I hope you keep growing and I hope you find peace.
@@jimmyzareYour profile is a tad ironic, but ill look past it and ask why its not good rep? What would
Improve this animation or how SHOULD anya be acting to you.
@@L1ama.Tr0n why is it ironic? genuinely don't know
@@garden_creatureTheir profile is Jimmy, who is a known well R pist, who, caused the character in this video, anya, suffering in the game their both from. Its just ironic because their profile is based on the character and they are also sharing a conflicting view with the comment they replied to, it feels like something the actual character would say, so it just made me giggle a bit
@@L1ama.Tr0n Thankfully they changed it to Luffy who is cool
@@Candle.stickz Oh, not me. There was some asshat in here cosplaying as Jimmy from Mouthwashing. He was saying something weird, but I couldn't tell you what it was. I straight up didn't read it when I saw his name.
YOU CANNOT BE HURTING ME LIKE THIS
FR😭😭
I came for memes and left in tears
no deadass 😭
Not an SA suvivor, but I carry a lot of trauma.
This made me cry, especially the "how bad does it need to hurt" line.
How much does any of our trauma- emotional, physical, sexual or otherwise have to hurt for us to be believed? To be cared for and validated?
Thank you for this Joetastic.
I hope everyone here knows they are valid for how they move on, how fast they move on and how they feel about their trauma.
I'll support you, you're valid and loved.
You're a normal person if you move on quickly, slowly, or not at all.
We're all different, and that's okay. Some of us just bounce back easier than others.
Good day/afternoon/night to everybody. Your trauma and how you feel and cope is valid.
Fuck, sorry for the essay- this video made me sob and I'm happy it made me feel that way.
Much love to you for saying this. Thank you. ❤
Thank you,I hope you will have such good life
I'd give Anya a hug too
To be honest, these expectations from victims of violence are definitely depressing and even frightening. like:If you don't act like that, you're not a victim, you're a liar. This is disgusting and must stop. I wish you all good friends, partners and family members.
Honestly, anya truly deserves a loving and caring someone. Even if not a partner, somebody to hold her, make her feel safe. Even if she is a victim, she's not helples. She's stronger, and capable of handling things herself. But, how long can a iron bar last till it rusts. I love how Eira is very gentle and understanding is giving her all the time and space she needs without forcing her anything ❤
Eira is everything curly should have been, and wasn't
@CamilomboNPC exactly. And honestly, Anya having a girlfriend makes more sense than having a boyfriend since her possible trauma of men now. Being in her shoes, I can understand how it feels to be around men now.
THANK U, As a victim, I appreciate this. At the end of the day, we are people, not just victims
I appreciate this a lot, as a victim of S/A that spanned for years straight, I can't stand the idea that Anya just isn't allowed to ever want anything to happen again. I don't like the really gross fetishy stuff I've come across, but people get harassed just for drawing some fluffy / gentle nsfw with her and it drives me wild.. victims process things in different ways, and hypersexuality is even a common response to trauma (not that i hc her as hypersexual, but still, worth noting just on the topic)
THISTHISTHIS OMG.
MY HEALTHY YURI 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
Felt the same things Anya had expressed in this video. It sucks to feel like you’re not responding the way you should, especially with Hypersexuality, and to have someone who gets you means the world.
realist and most relatable comment I've seen in a while
Clinical Trial and Mouthwashing combining into a maximum depression experience
yes!! im not the only one who thought of CT!!
I’m pretty sure it is just directly a clinical trial reference considering most of the words are exactly the same
oh wow the title itself hurt me personally
same... I knew I had to click as soon as I saw it
Well, I guess I found a home here-
thank you for making this it means a lot to me. i think the fandom's perception that SA victims can never want sex ever again is so harmful.. everyone has a different relationship with their experience and we shouldn't put people in boxes.
Important message to everyone:
You're allowed to deal with your trauma anyway you want and need. It doesn't matter if you healing fast or slowly, it doesn't matter if you wanna be alone or with someone, it doesn't matter if the way you're feeling doesn't fit into the standards of "normal" when, in my opinion, there shouldn't be a certain way to respond trauma, what matters is that you heal, that you get better and that you feel good.
i am sobbing ttysm for this comment. genuinely. i am fortunate enough to have friends who see me for who i truly am, regardless of my sexual trauma, but the lingering fear that may change deeply upsets me. i needed to hear that.
anya's mischaracterization is the dante mischaracterization of the community
Wait? Dante as in Devil May Cry Dante?!
@blossxma yes, Dante as DMC Dante.
@@hitorisan111 What exactly do you mean by Dante being mischaracterized? I ask as a huge Dante fangirl
@blossxma I think the other comment tries to explain that, sometimes (or most of the time I guess, im still very new in the DMC fandom) Dante is heavily mischaracterizated as a "goofy pervert womanizer" (or smth like that) by some fans, when Dante's character is pretty much deeper than just his goofy and cocky personality.
@blossxma Another example could be Gojo Satoru's mischaracterization too, when most of the time, fans thinks he's the typical "goofy womanizer rich and super strong sorcerer" character when Satoru is so much more than just that.
1:18 i know i shouldn't laugh her but HDJSJAJ HER FACE OMG 💔💔
Anya: If i kill myse-
GIRL DON'T 😭😭
dude i was about to cry sad tears and then that face made me cry laughing tears istg 😂
THE CLINICAL TRIAL DIALOGUE??? I'M GOING INSANE. This is so beautiful 💗💐
"only for one patient" this is too good omg it brought me to tears
This hits hard when you’re a victim/survivor yourself, and you’re wary of telling your story to others because you don’t wanna feel dehumanized all because you don’t fit the ‘perfect victim’ stereotype.
Victims are still people, they still have wants, needs and dreams beyond their trauma
Ho did you just stab me and twist the knife😭😭😭😭
RIGHT?
i relate to canon Anya and this Anya... idk if this is related, but i am a teenage lesbian, yet i'm afraid to even say it to people irl(especially my mother) who heard of what happened between me and my step sister. i told a trusting trans(?) female friend before "i got S@'d by my other older sister when i was 8" and she said "so thats why you're a lesbian"
at this point, when making a new friend, trustworthy or not, i might need to keep either my experience or sexuality a secret. theres no in between.
I’m sorry to hear that, but I hope you’re one day comfortable enough to be able to tell someone, and if not, that’s okay too. It’s up to you and if you feel the need to keep both things or only one thing a secret that’s totally fine. Sending virtual hugs to you my friend. :3
@Itun3z-selor thank you :)
@ You’re welcome! I wish you the best :3
I hate when people say homosexuality is due to trauma, you don’t get to hear this shit when the abuser is the opposite sex of the victim, people don’t go “that’s why you’re straight” smh, don’t listen to those people they’re just pretty homophobic even if they’re themselves queer and remember you’re always more than your trauma, hope you’re doing good and you’re in a better place now
@@LauraVanessaEscobarSalazar i agree with you, if i told people i was s@'d by a man/boy they wouldn't say "that's why you like boys". i am in a better place, thanks :> i'm just anxious of what secret to tell future friends when i have the chance. like, if a future male friend told me he wants to be my boyfriend, i'd wanna tell him i'm lesbian, but telling him about my sister before or after... yeah :(
The fanfic got real
Absolutely amazing writing
This is one of the most wholesome and sweetest things I've seen in my life. I love how supportive the white haired gf (I forgot her name ;-;) is of Anya, and how she's understanding of her trauma and tries to make sure whether or not she's ok or comfortable!
The girlfriend's name is Eira.
@xlb2376 thank you
Im gonna say it. Eira needs to become a plushie
We all know thats gonna happen after gta 6 and mouthwashing 2
no she doesn’t
@@LuluBearrr Hush
God this hurts me. But I relate to it so much. Victims are so much more than just victims, we aren't our trauma. I love this man
You cant keeping making something so cute but so emotional at the same time... YOU CAN'T KEEP GETTING AWAY THIS...! YOU CAN'T KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH THIS!!
I guess it's like what Anya said in the game: "Our worst moments don't define us."
Your animations are so beautiful thank you for making these
Glad you like them!
This is WAYYY too relatable as a SA victim, there has been multiple points in my life where i’m worried if my trauma really mattered just because i still like the idea of being in a sexual relationship, i feel like this is a topic that not many people discuss about SA which is kind of stressful to me as a victim since all it does is make me feel like i’m unable to feel love or be loved in a way that genuinely makes me feel happy, i’m glad you touched on it :]
This is adorable. Humanity has won, we will conquer the stars, billions must smile.
Eira mentioned THE GOAT
People need to understand that yes Anya is a victim but she is still a person. She can still have fun move on all while still being a victim, that doesn't have to change everything. I'm personally a Curlya shipper and I always see people say that it's too soon, well when is the right time? A person is allowed to move on and heal.
0:21 Dont say this pls,im getting Omni Man flashbacks
Now's not the time, I'm crying 😭
@calicobagelsare you sure? 🦸
@@MisterÊnis6969 are you sure?
@calicobagels 𝐀𝐫𝐞 𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐒𝐮𝐫𝐞?
Are you sure?
I don’t want to call myself a victim because that’ll show how bad I was affected by it, yet when I’m told I’m a survivor I don’t feel like I survived. The handprints on my skin shouldn’t define who I am as a person, I am more than what’s been done to me.
these two have my whole heart 😞😞😞😞
I am sorry for what you have been hearing from others, I know precisely what even encouraged this animation to be made to begin with. Eira’s dynamic with Anya is adorable, and I wish to keep seeing it further. Please keep your awesome work up ❤
VOICE ACTING!!!!🗣️🔊🗣️🔊
IS THIS CLINICAL TRIAL REFERENCE??W
I WAS LOOKING FOR THIS COMMENT!!!!
I LOVE CELADON!!! They're able to voice both characters and it feels like two different characters and I adore their voice, they're so cool!!!
I hate how people paint Anya as such a helpless scared girl but shes so much more than that
aww not Eiras little eye change when Anya mentions ending herself :((
Bruh i swear Anya is my lock screen because i saw her AND INSTANTLY RELATED.
Bruh this hits home
“How bad should it hurt?” I felt the emotion in that line. The voice acting and animation in this is so good!
This hit deep as someone who dealt with the same thing she went through
this moment in not only CT but mouthwashing always made me wonder about my assault, seeing how victims still acknowledge everything and yet for me?
it never felt like i was dirty enough to feel like a victim
it wasnt enough to feel anything, and in most years i just buried it
no one would believe me, my own mom didnt. she blamed me for it
it hurts being a victim when all anyone expects you to be is helpless
so i hid it
i lied, i pretended nothing happened at all
its like when you speak about something that was painful for you, everyone is so quick to contrast and compare, yell at you to some how make it your fault
im not even in highschool, i barely have any energy to do anything academically, the support i get is simply people saying how smart i am for not being a idiot to trust ANYONE.
its so suffocating
its killing me
anya's story is what i whole heartedly emphasize with
because it makes anyone feel sick on how detailed the undertones of everything is, the details tell you everything you need to know about it and you dont even KNOW unless another points it out.
angel is how any victim first reacts or feels about it
the uncertainty, the pain
the delusion and the wishing of anything better
i crave for more stories that for once dont make me feel like a helpless bastard waiting for some non existent god to take the blame of this shit
1:17 “Because, you’re in the thick of it, and everybody knows 😭😭”
What.
@@Lesbain-Freak-On-A-Leash I love your username🫶
@@Hazbin12316 tyyy
What does this mean 😭😭😭
(Insert lowtiergod monologue here)
GUYS THE DIALOGUE IS FROM CLINICAL TRIAL not saying that it’s bad that they’re using it but clinical trial is also an amazing indie game that’s only 2 hours long. I mean the ending isn’t the best but it also has good characters and the MC is a survivor who the dialogue comes from
seeing a crossover from two of my fav games and my current obsession makes me so fucking happy, this is so goodd!! Tysm for blessing my feed
Such a heartwarming video, I love these girls, but this also makes a HUGE point.
I really love this bc even though I'm not a victim seeing people, especially grown adults be infantilized or put in a box of this idea that every victim is this meek, helpless, innocent, baby in need of protecting 24/7, now after all your trauma that's all you'll be seen for, and you can't be a normal person and live your life they way you want because it wouldn't be realistic for a victim.
Some people are traumatized to that point, some are able to heal after sometime bit everyone's different. Saying that a victim shouldn't want any relationships after being traumatized sounds like if you went through something it should scar you for the rest of your life or until the expected time.
But in reality, NO ONE wants to be traumatized to the point their life will never be the same again, or they're too scarred to be intimate with someone. Victims should be seen as more sometimes.
Basically, should be relieving if someone can still enjoy and live a normal life, not if they can't.
I LNEW FROM THE TITLE IT WAS CLINICAL TRIAL OH MY GOD. I LOVE THIS
The voice acting and animation in this is so amazing and wholesome, I love it! 🗣️🔥
Great adaptation of clinical trial scene real works here.
I’m not crying my eyes is just sweaty
The fact that when Anya said she wanted to off herself, the fact that Eira eyes widened would show concern. I think I actually made me cry a bit.
OH I'M GONNA CRYYYYYY
This is so beautiful
Beautifully made
The animation is so good
The voice acting is amazing
The music fits so well
It's so warm how Eira comforts Anya, and wants to make sure She's comfortable ❤
As an SA victim, "how bad should it hurt" broke me cause I felt that and still do 😭
Up until very recently I've "forgotten" or repressed my sexual trauma. As someone who was very uncomfortable with discourse surrounding Anya, this really struck and comforted me. You explored this in a way that felt real to me personally and I'm so happy to see you represent something like this in such a way. Thank you for giving me one more reason to find my voice. but also like how could you do this to me. 💔💔my heart
AHHH they're so cute. Really like the writing too :>
I’ve rewatched this so many times since I saw it for the first time and it brings me to tears almost every single time. I’ve been struggling with this so hard. Thank you for making this and thank you to everyone else involved.
video so good it has me throwing up and sobbing and bursting into flames
OH WE ARE BECOMING SELF-AWARE OF THE FANDOM NOW
“You’d make a good nurse, you know that?” “Only for one Patient” KILL ME NOW OMFG AHHHHH THEIR TOO ADORABLE
love the voice for Anya and Eira. celadonva did a great job!
I actually stood up and applauded like i had just heard, and Orchestra set finish when i heard Anya's VA she sounds amazing
COMFORT YURI 🥳🥳🎉🎉
Damn...WHY YOU ARE RIGHT!?
My favourite
i want to give anya all the love of the world and the biggest hug ever, she didn't deserve anything bad she want through
OMG OMGGG CLINICAL TRIAL REFERENCE
I LOVE THE EIRA VIDS. AND MY WHOLE DISCORD SERVER ( that i created somehow) LOVES IT AND YOUR VIDS
This literally brought me to tears, I love this sm!!!!! It hit me in the gut though…as someone who’s almost had this happen this video felt comforting to me. Anya, getting someone who will treat her well, someone who cares for her, it’s so sweet. I someday hope to find someone who will comfort me this way, so thank you! Thank you for giving me that little piece of hope I needed!!!! 😊
daisuke would defo walk in and take a selfie with them sleeping in the back and put it on his snap story
oh.. the dialogues from Clinical Trial?! I hope the game gains recognition through this
feeling real cultured as soon as i saw the tittle
CLINICAL TRIAL MOMENT WITH MOUTHWASHING🤩
"if i kill myself... would anyone believe me then?"
not an sa survivor but that... hit home, for other reasons i won't discuss here and now. this was written beautifully :D
I have no idea who you are, or who this character is, but this entire video has got me fucked up. /pos. It’s… it’s beautiful. It’s heart wrenching. It’s what I needed when it happened to me. Plus, the animation is superb. You really captured the small movements to make it feel that much more real.
This scene from clinical trials really stuck with me feeling the same way angel as a character is someone I can relate to
This is written as good if not better than the game and all i ask is to see more of this AU
CLINICAL TRIAL REF?!?8??8!!?
"Alright, I'm gonna go cry."
-Jake Peralta -B99
WHY DID YOU JUST FLY AN AIRPLANE INTO ME? 😭
This is giving me goosebumps... Please make them happy 😭
I've been treated like this by my school therapist and therapist. Telling me that I shouldn't have any extreme feelings towards my groomer.
I appreciate this video so so much. It's putting a voice and words to feelings I've experienced as a survivor myself.
Also Joe can you stop taking me out back and shooting me 57 times thanks?
I love this animation it's so amazing and I think you capture Anya better than most people can describe her character!
also why does the dialogue remind me of clinical trial-
because the script is from clinical trial
JUST DIES LITERALLY DEAD RN ON THE FLOOR DEAD OMG. nah this is fire tysm ily
I feel like Joetastic is slowly escalating and will eventually just release a whole feature-length film of these two
thanks! this hurts
CLINICAL TRIAL AND MOUTHWASHING?? IM GONNA CRY 😭
I love comfort yuri😢❤
this video made me want to cry, keep up the good work.
I just. Wow. Phenomenal job, as always.
IT HURTSSS
thank you for making this